This is how Matthew ends his version of the story of Jesus heals a demon possessed boy.
Matthew 17:20
20 He replied, “Because you have so little faith. Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.”
Hearing Jesus say "if you have faith as small as a mustard seed" makes me think, Obviously I haven't moved any mountains lately, So I don't have faith the size of a mustard seed. So, if my faith isn't the size of a mustard seed, what size is it? Before we try and answer that question, I want to look at the same story, but in the book of Mark.
Mark 9:14-29
Jesus Heals a Boy Possessed by an Impure Spirit
14 When they came to the other disciples, they saw a large crowd around them and the teachers of the law arguing with them. 15 As soon as all the people saw Jesus, they were overwhelmed with wonder and ran to greet him. 16 “What are you arguing with them about?” he asked. 17 A man in the crowd answered, “Teacher, I brought you my son, who is possessed by a spirit that has robbed him of speech. 18 Whenever it seizes him, it throws him to the ground. He foams at the mouth, gnashes his teeth and becomes rigid. I asked your disciples to drive out the spirit, but they could not.” 19 “You unbelieving generation,” Jesus replied, “how long shall I stay with you? How long shall I put up with you? Bring the boy to me.” 20 So they brought him. When the spirit saw Jesus, it immediately threw the boy into a convulsion. He fell to the ground and rolled around, foaming at the mouth. 21 Jesus asked the boy’s father, “How long has he been like this?” “From childhood,” he answered. 22 “It has often thrown him into fire or water to kill him. But if you can do anything, take pity on us and help us.” 23 “ ‘If you can’?” said Jesus. “Everything is possible for one who believes.” 24 Immediately the boy’s father exclaimed, “I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief!” 25 When Jesus saw that a crowd was running to the scene, he rebuked the impure spirit. “You deaf and mute spirit,” he said, “I command you, come out of him and never enter him again.” 26 The spirit shrieked, convulsed him violently and came out. The boy looked so much like a corpse that many said, “He’s dead.” 27 But Jesus took him by the hand and lifted him to his feet, and he stood up. 28 After Jesus had gone indoors, his disciples asked him privately, “Why couldn’t we drive it out?” 29 He replied, “This kind can come out only by prayer.”
Look at the man's reply starting in verse 22, he says "But, if you can do anything?" Jesus calls him out right away. I love what the man says when Jesus calls him out. This is my answer to the size of my faith. He responds, "I do believe; help me overcome my unbelief". What? Before I continue, I want to just say, I believe everything that is in the bible. I think that some people believe that certain parts are not supposed to be taken literally, but I believe that all of those parts are literal. Everything that it says happened, 100% truly happened. I like to tell people that on the day I was born my parents taught me about the bible and on the second day they taught me about baseball. I don't know if that is completely accurate, but I just want to point out that 45 years later I still love the bible and baseball. So it makes me sad to admit I still have unbelief. I know that God has the power to heal, I know that no matter what the situation, God is in control. Especially when it comes to everyone else. But my unbelief always involves me. I know my sins, I know my faults. How can I have faith even the size of a mustard seed with the mistakes I've made. Doesn't that mean that I am part of the unbelieving nation mentioned in verse 19? I'm not sure why the father had unbelief, I'm guessing that in the moment some part of him was having flashbacks of every single mistake he had ever made and was worried that because of those mistakes the man who had the ability to heal his son would hold it against him. I looked up the definition of faith, it says, complete trust or confidence in someone or something. A strong belief in God or in the doctrine of a religion based on spiritual apprehension rather than proof. I've come to the conclusion that the two main reasons that we don't have enough faith on a regular basis are lack of time spending time with God in prayer and not bringing everything to God that we should bring to him. If we aren't talking with him, we don't have a relationship with him. If we don't have a relationship with him, why would we have faith in him. When I was younger and something big was going on in my life, I knew that I should pray about it. But, I convinced myself that I shouldn't pray because it was unfair of me to go to God with something big when I didn't go to him with the little things. After awhile, I decided the only way to fix that in my mind was to start going to him with the little things. What can I do today, to start working to have faith the size of a mustard seed?
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